There is a Buddhist teaching about the second arrow. The idea is this. Life is suffering. Whether you are a Buddhist or not, you will encounter suffering along your path. Whether we like it or not, everyone that we know and love will pass away one day. This is the first arrow. The second arrow is our reaction to the first arrow. What we feel and think about the first arrow is often how we harm ourselves again. But it is our choice.
Yesterday, I wrote about how I had "Fallen Off the Wagon". Now I could choose to give myself a hard time about that. I could think, "I am not disciplined enough or strong-willed enough." or " I was so screwed up in the first place there is no way I should have gone off caffeine so quickly" or " I am not smart enough to remember that I should have weened myself off." And on and on. And we can get stuck in our thoughts and feelings and continue to dwell in them creating even more suffering.
But every moment we have a choice, we can choose to live fully in the present or we can dwell in the past or the future. I have chosen to get back on the wagon. No! Today, I choose that it is a luxurious restorative yoga pose on my yoga mat. ( Why does it have to be a wagon?) And I renew my intentions to cleanse wisely and gently.